Received from a friend - hope all you youngsters enjoy it.
What Made Me Me
Long ago and far away, In a land that time forgot
Before the days of Dylan,
Or the dawn of Camelot.
There lived a race of innocents, And they were you and me
Long ago and far away,
In the Land That Made Me Me.
Oh there was truth and goodness, In that land where we were born
Where navels were for oranges,
And Peyton Place was porn.
For Ike was in the White House, And Hoss was on TV
And God was in His heaven,
In the Land That Made Me Me.
We learned to gut a muffler, We washed our hair at dawn
We spread our crinolines to dry,
In circles on the lawn.
And they could hear us coming, All the way to Tennessee
All starched and sprayed and rumbling,
in the Land That Made Me Me.
We longed for love and romance, And waited for the prince
And Eddie Fisher married Liz,
And no one's seen him since.
We danced to "Little Darlin”,
And sang to "Stagger Lee"
And cried for Buddy Holly,
In the Land That Made Me Me.
Only girls wore earrings then, And three was one too many
And only boys wore flat-top cuts,
Except for Jean McKinney.
And only in our wildest dreams,
Did we expect to see
A boy named George with lipstick,
In the Land That Made Me Me.
We fell for Frankie Avalon, Annette was oh, so nice
And when they made a movie,
They never made it twice.
We didn't have a Star Trek Five, Or Psycho Two and Three
Or Rockey-Rambo Twenty,
In the Land That Made Me Me.
Miss Kitty had a heart of gold, And Chester had a limp
And Reagan was a Democrat,
Whose co-star was a chimp.
We had a Mr. Wizard, But not a Mr. T
And Oprah couldn't talk yet,
In the Land That Made Me Me.
We had our share of heroes, We never thought they'd go
At least not Bobby Darin,
Or Marilyn Monroe.
For youth was still eternal, And life was yet to be
And Elvis was forever,
In the Land T hat Made Me Me.
We'd never seen the rock band, That was Grateful to be Dead
And Airplanes weren't named Jefferson,
And Zeppelins weren't Led.
And Beatles lived in gardens then, And Monkees in a tree
Madonna was a virgin,
In the Land That Made Me Me.
We'd never heard of Microwaves, Or telephones in cars
And babies might be bottle-fed,
But they weren't grown in jars.
And pumping iron got wrinkles out, And "gay" meant fancy-free
And dorms were never coed,
In the Land That Made Me Me.
We hadn't seen enough of jets, To talk about the lag
And microchips were what was left at,
The bottom of the bag.
And Hardware was a box of nails, And bytes came from a flea
And rocket ships were fiction,
In the Land That Made Me Me.
Buicks came with portholes, And side show came with freaks
And bathing suits came big enough,
To cover both your cheeks.
And Coke came just in bottles, And skirts came to the knee
And Castro came to power,
In the Land That Made Me Me.
We had no Crest with Fluoride, We had no Hill Street Blues
We all wore superstructure bras,
Designed by Howard Hughes.
We had no patterned pantyhose,
Or Lipton herbal tea
Or prime-time ads for condoms,
In the Land That Made Me Me.
There were no golden arches, No Perriers to chill
And fish were not called Wanda,
And cats were not called Bill.
And middle-aged was thirty-five, And old was forty-three
And ancient was our parents,
In the Land That Made Me Me.
But all things have a season, Or so we've heard them say
And now instead of Maybelline,
We swear by Retin-A.
And they send us invitations, To join AARP
We've come a long way baby,
From the Land That Made Me Me.
So now we face a brave new world, In slightly larger jeans
And wonder why they're using,
Smaller print in magazines.
And we tell our children's children, of the way it used to be
Long ago, and far away,
In the Land That Made Me Me.
--Author unknown |
